Wednesday, April 19, 2006

The Dreaded LDR

Who likes long distance relationships? Not me!

Long distance relationships or LDRs are the bane of a couple's existence. After all, what's the point of a relationship if there is no proper communication? (Email, phone calls and IM don't really count)

Things are hard enough as it is when you're trying to make a relationship work. Throw in distance into the mix and you've got a ticking bomb in your hands.

I know quite a bit about LDRs coz I've lived through a couple of them. My then boyfriend, now husband, travelled quite a bit.I remember trying really hard to cope during that time.

I turned to my friends only to realise that almost all of them were involved in relationships and therefore have a routine with their boyfriends on weekends and public holidays. Sure, they were up for meeting for a coffee or drinks ever so often but what was I supposed to do the rest of the time? Besides, my penchant for grabbing my phone and checking for messages must have cheesed them off!

Inspired by visions of Demi Moore in Ghost, I then decided to take up pottery. Unfortunately I didn't achieve anything aside from finding out that I suck at crafting anything out of clay.

Some ppl seem to think that LDRs allow space between a couple which is a good way to keep everything feeling fresh. I happen to think that that's a load of phooey! How's a couple supposed to even get to know each other when you're miles apart half the time. I'm not suggesting that you should live your life, tied at the hip, with your significant other. But too much distance for too long is disaster.

No, I believe that while LDRs are a fact of life, they're most certainly also a pain in the butt. Anyone who has ever been in an LDR or is currently in one (you poor thing!), do feel free to share. LDRs - beneficial to relationships or just phooey..whaddya think?

Friday, April 07, 2006

Stories about men

While I was writing my column for tomorrow, I decided to talk to a few girls to get other opinions. I mentioned The Toothpaste Issue to them and they all agreed. The smaller details of house and hearth still fall back on the women.

But that's already been discussed in the column. Talks with the girls, however, brought up plenty of other stories about the silly idiosyncracies of men when you co-habit. Like:

- the habit of squeezing out the last dregs of toothpaste instead of going out to get some more.

- using our shaving cream when they've run out of theirs (and then complaining that it smells too girly!)

- getting cross when we "accuse" them of not contributing to the house. One of the girls I spoke to said she even tried not cleaning the bathrooms because her husband had gotten upset when she mentioned to him that he never cleaned and adamantly insisted that he would clean it. It never got cleaned, of course.

- using an excessive amount of your expensive face creams. My own mother has complained that while you are only supposed to use a dot's worth of this particular serum, my father had been squeezing out a line of the stuff that spanned the length of his palm.

- taking longer to get ready than we do. It is totally untrue that women take ages to get dressed. Almost all the women I've spoken to bemoan the fact that they're usually the one's standing around the front door waiting while their partners agonise over doing their hair.

- the complete inability to remember things. My boyfriend pointed out, "You know, we don't leave lights on and forget to things on purpose to irritate you. We just forget." Girls the world jump off their apartment balconies screaming in frustration at the fact that their boys are highly able , intelligent human beings, capable of cutting deals worth millions and yet, totally incapable of remembering that the socks go in the laundry basket, not the floor.

The boyfriend (and many other male friends) said that women are just being too petty. I say that it's not petty anymore when the small petty things add up to an every-hour, every day affair!

Then again, we do love them all to bits. We wouldn't keep putting up with the old flat toothpaste tube if we didn't! Perhaps it makes life more entertaining?