I'm sure you'd already noticed but I've only just seen that there are a million mistakes in the last column entry - inconsistent grammar, inverted commas in the wrong places and reads about as smoothly as the traffic does through all those traffic lights on Jalan Maarof.
THIS ISN'T MY FAULT! *Cries*
After sending it in with spotless, perfect grammar (because I am an anal grammar queen) and character to make it a more interesting read (it is a column, after all, not a news story) somebody hacked it into pieces and instead of editing it for the better, made me sound like I didn't make it past my GCSEs. I mean, he/she's only editing for the largest newspaper in Malaysia - couldn't they get the punctuation marks right at the very least?!
And, because I'm anal like that, I'm replacing the column entry below with my original unedited copy.