Monday, September 03, 2007

There's no ugly like Crocs Ugly

I'm going to come right out and say it: Crocs are U-G-L-Y.

They're so horrible that they border on offensive. C'mon, be honest with yourself and take a good, long look:




The first time I saw a pair, I actually held my breath for a few moments because I'd never laid eyes upon such ugly shoes (and I've seen some hideous footwear in my lifetime, trust me - I grew up in the 80s).

The people who released these revolting shoes upon the world have tried their darndest to pretty-them-up with cute colours but ugly, they stubbornly remain.


A friend recently wore them and I couldn't take my eyes off them - it's like the scene of a car crash, you don't want to look but you just have to! My friend's pair was black which made them all the uglier (if that's even possible!).

To her credit, she admitted that they're quite awful and that she would never have bought them for herself ( which is a good thing because I find it hard to remain friends with people who knowingly subject their friends to Crocs). They were a gift and she'd contemplated ignoring them completely but the moment she put them on, she said just couldn't take them off again - they were SO comfortable!

For the longest time, the Crocs craze was a mystery to me. All was revealed when I tried on a pair and they were possibly the most comfortable things I'd ever had on my feet. I almost gave in to the sudden urge to ignore what my eyes were telling me and run out and buy a pair for myself. I managed to fling them off my feet just in time. It was like being under some kind of spell - their comfort makes you forget how revolting they look!

Comfort or no comfort, that's no excuse to prance around with what looks like the footwear of choice for the trolls and goblins in Enid Blyton's books. I've never seen any human being look good in Crocs. That's probably because they belong on something that looks like this:


I believe the only people who can give Crocs a run for their ugly money are the Dutch and their hideous wooden shoes (try not to look directly at them)



Hopefully the good people at Crocs will eventually come up with something that's just as comfortable but with a severely diminished level of Ugly.If they don't, I propose that the English language expands to include a new phrase - "Croc Ugly".This will be used to describe something that looks particularly horrendous when all other words fail to hit the mark.

Meanwhile, in protest, I shall endeavor to remain resistant to these revolting things. Promise to shoot me if you see me in them.

pics courtesy of: www.kickmaster.com,www.theorthoticgroup.com,www.hegemonyrules.net

4 comments:

delphynus said...

couldnt agree with u more trisha! those crocs are croc ugly.

and what is unfathomable to me is this:
the pasar malam ppl come up with the pirated version of these shoes and sell them dirt cheap - and i doubt that they will be as comfortable as the original ones. AND PEOPLE ACTUALLY BUY THEM...it's ugly ugly ugly...wake up, people!

sorry for the outburst, but this issue has been nagging me. i blogged about it some time back too...haha!
u stay away from those ugly shoes i tell u. away! :)

have a good day!

Trisha said...

I've been away from KL for a while now and had no idea about the pasar malam Crocs situation!

You're right, Delphynus; the pasar malam Crocs just can't be comfortable which leads to a frigtening conclusion: some people are wearing them as a fashion statement. Horrors!!!!

Thank goodness there are still people like you out there who see the light about these abominations!

PS: Don't worry bout the outburst. Crocs bring up strong emotions in me too : )

Anonymous said...

Crocs are horrible. I'm afraid I can't describe my feelings towards Crocs any better than the way Maddox put it, and that is "The only thing that goes with Crocs is social ostracism.".

Melanie (Stone) Perry said...

THE most brilliant piece of social commentary I've come across in a long while.

I couldn't agree with you more.

So far, I've resisted even the urge to try a pair on, for fear of being drawn in by the idea of comfort (because I'm normally not afraid to dress for comfort).

Cheers for staying strong!